Toxic People

Good Morning.

Here is my little corner of the world, it is cold, dark and rainy. I find this fitting, as it goes with my current mood. Not that I am sad, or even angry, just contemplative. Have you ever pondered what to do about the toxic people in your life? Sure you love them, but do you need them there? Should you keep them there? It is hard to tell someone that you can't be around them, whether it be due to drugs, alcoholism or just their every day way of being.

As I sit here with a heavy heart trying to decide what to do, I open my bible. God will tell us what we need to know, if we listen to Him. I once read an article that said God brings people into our lives to benefit us, help us and to even guide us, but so does Satan except he doesn't want to help us, he wants to destroy us.

Sitting in church yesterday, the pastor said something to me that caught my attention, He said, "Wake up and smell the coffee," Now he was talking about letting down your guard and opening the door to let him in. That we need more of Him and less of the world. He also asked what was preventing us from opening the door. James 1:8 says, "Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do." Our loyalty needs to be with God, not with the world and not to the toxic people in our life.

I can admit that I have a guard around my heart where people are concerned, but these guards that we build don't just block out people. So my question is, who are the toxic people in your life? What do we do about these people?

Some people are harder to let go of than others. Let's take a substance addicted parent or family member as an example. You love them, but they can barely love themselves. You want to help them, but at some point you have to realize you can't. You can't make someone get the help you know they need. They have to want help. I can't tell you want to do, but I can tell you that you need to let them go. They affect you.

How? They help you keep your guard up. They hurt you and don't even realize they do. They attack your children, children they are supposed to love and who are supposed to feel safe around. Remember, emotional attacks are just as hurtful and painful as physical ones. Letting go, doesn't mean you hate them or no longer love them. It means that you love yourself enough to realize the toxicity they bring and that seeps into your heart. Their bitterness and anger, leaves you feeling bitter and angry and prevents you from what God wants you to have. Distance is key to removing that bitterness and anger. It also tells them that even though you love them, you will not let them destroy you. There is a song by Reba McEntire and Trisha Yearwood called, "She Save Him" that makes me t

that makes me think of Toxic people. We can't save them. No matter how much we want to, we can't.

Pray for them, yes, Let them in, no. Also, when you let go, don't do so in anger, Don't make a hard situation worse, by using words in anger and frustration. Walk away, but make sure that there is a way back when/if they change.

As I write this, I am not angry or bitter, I am just coming to the realization that its time to let go of those that whether intentionally or unintentionally, harm myself or my children in any negative way, I need to protect them more than I need to protect myself. Same goes for you.

So here I will sit, drinking my coffee and contemplating the best way to let go.

Until the next Scribble....