Tuesday, May 15, 2012

You said what?!?


At the grocery store yesterday, I overhear a guy talking on his phone, (and you say we girls talk a lot), saying he doesn’t understand how on earth his wife could possibly think that her staying home with the kids all day is harder than going to work all day. The poor baby has to go to work every day and even on the weekends sometimes. Oh and he has a boss to deal with, and deadlines (Oh my), and he has actual work to do! How he would love to babysit (WHAT?! Babysit your own kids?!) all day and get to stay in his pajamas all day if he chooses (hey buddy even Peg Bundy got dressed). Hell half the time he is not sure she even brushes her teeth (are you kidding me, leave her!).  Motherhood, he states, the job of women who are lazy and lack ambition, seriously, (You’re not seriously wondering why you don’t get sex often anymore are you buddy??).  How hard can it be, he tells his friend, to wipe up spilled cheerios and watch TV all gosh darn day?

With the amount of respect he so obviiiiiously has for his wife, I can’t figure out my reluctance to take that road again! I want to smack him for his wife and save her the domestic dispute and spousal abuse charges, Mr. Sunshine would obviously charge her with.

Only about a million responses immediately flew to my head! Lazy and lack ambition? OK I have heard that before, but to say it about your own wife? The woman, who carried YOUR child for 9 months, gave birth and now gives up her career to be a mom to the child you two created? Oh buddy I would run! She must be a saint or blind!

How do you think your laundry gets done? What about the clean house to and who do you think cooks your dinner? Unless, and I highly doubt it, you have a maid, a cook and a laundry service your baby sitter did all that! Do you think little magic fairies arrive when you leave and *POOF* everything is magically done at the wave of a wand or twitch of a nose? (Oh how we all wish we could be Samantha Stevens)

So, to the overworked, probably under paid and absolute ray of sunshine, in the store, get a clue moron! We have bosses too, they just come in smaller packages, wear diapers, throw bottles at us and puke all over us daily, OR they come in the package of a demon possessed teenager who only knows, “I hate you”, “you ruined my life” or some other adorable explanation like that. They dictate our daily schedules 24/7, at least you get to leave your boss at the office ours climbs in our bed at night when they have a nightmare!

We once had figures that looked like a figure, we had time on our hands to do what we wanted and go where we want, now it’s about ballet, baseball and PTA!  Don’t get me started on deadlines! With our bosses it is now, Now, NOW or wham, bottle in the head because NOW was not soon enough!

We do your laundry, clean your house, raise your children, go to PTA meetings,  ballet class, pick up the cheerios off the floor, cook dinner,  pick up the toys, tuck them in to bed, does your boss need you to tuck them into bed? (Second thought, they better not!), we run your errands, go to the grocery store, listen to Barney or Dora the Explorer (or in the case of the demon possessed teenager strange music that sounds strangely enough like Satan yelling into a Mic!), and when we actually do try to have sex, a kid wakes up! Nothing in our lives is the same anymore, nor would we give up one second of it, but hey let’s trade for a day and see who is crying by the end of the day! It won’t be Mom (well until she sees all the work you didn’t get done because you couldn’t figure out how to run the washer and dryer, or turn the vacuum on or know what the word cleaning actually meant!) Just sayin….

Until next time....

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